Tuesday, June 6, 2017

my ode to skincare.

okay, so for the past few months i've been involved in a very special and awesome skincare group that focuses mainly on AB beauty. (AB is Asian Beauty yo) and it's really ignited my love and passion for skincare. 

if you don't know (or don't remember) i started being interested in skincare a few years back when my skin suddenly went haywire. i don't know what caused it, i don't even know how i fixed it (lol) but suddenly my skin, which was previously combination oily and acne prone but generally not horrible, started becoming flaky, and very dry, and very painful. i developed eczema patches under my eyes and around my forehead, and i was very depressed at the time. i felt horrible and i thought i looked horrible. 

i also began to experience allergic reactions to seemingly random products. some that i've used before, some that i bought to counter my skin issues. i was distraught, i was spending so much money buying skincare that i couldn't wear! so i started to research and carefully understand the stuff that i was putting on my skin. i was on a mission to fix this shit, and i wasn't gonna give up on my skin. 

at the time, my interested leaned heavily towards western skincare, specifically natural and organic ingredients. the simpler the ingredients were, the better for me because then i'd be able to identify what triggered my allergic reactions. i relied on oils (rosehip oil will forever be my jam, but argan oil really worked for my skin then) and rosewater (soothing and good for dry skin) and i loved honey masks (manuka honey because of the higher antibacterial ingredients). over the following years, my skin slowly healed, and it went from becoming super dry and flaky, to just dry, and then to normal (those days were the best. no pimples and no dryness lol) and now, my skin's back to it's usual combo oily self. i'm really happy with how my skin is at the moment, and more than that i'm happy that i took the time to learn about what i was putting on my face. 

now, at the time, due to my many sensitivities i of course leaned towards organic and natural skincare. however, now that i've learned more about skincare in general, i know and understand that natural does not necessarily mean better. some natural ingredients can aggravate acne, and some chemical-based (is this the right term? idk) like AHAs and BHAs can help the skin...when used correctly, of course. so now, 5 years later, here i am. i research most of the products i want to buy, i take care of my skin and pamper it because i only have the one face so might as well, and i try not to fall into skincare hypes or lean too heavily on what salespeople tell me about a certain product. so on and so forth, you know. 

having said all these things, i return to the main point of my rant lol. i'm now into Asian skincare. i like how affordable they are, and how they have products that target specific needs instead of a one-size-fits-all thing that some western brands adopt (although some AB brands do have those as well). more importantly, i think AB stuff suits my skin and where i live more cos they emphasize on layers of hydration, rather than 1 thick layer of cream that sits heavily on the skin (which suits their weather but feels kinda horrible in malaysia's humid conditions). sometimes i find products i like and wanna rave about them. sometimes i learn about skincare tips that make my skin feel and look amazeballs. sometimes i hate a product with a passion and wanna er, caution everyone else lol. 

whatever the case may be, i feel like i want to do more skincare and makeup-based (never forget the makeup lol) posts more on this blog, if i like them enough (and they're not ranty AF) then i might be persuaded to start a skincare and beauty blog as a personal record of my skincare journey. i don't know, i'm feeling a bit inspired at the moment. we'll see!

aaaand that's it for my skincare rant lol. next up, a post about something! idk. lol. bye!

Tuesday, May 2, 2017

psychosomatic wounds to the heart.

"let's compare scars, i'll tell you whose is worse" 

why do you do this to yourself?
time and time again you've told yourself to be stronger,
but time and time again you have failed.
you should be used to this.

you loan your heart out so freely to others,
always wishing for the best,
you feel too deeply,
for strangers and friends alike.

please don't despair,
words are just...words.
they cannot hurt you (yet they do).
they tear tiny little holes in your heart.

but then again,
that is your own fault,
for feeling too much,
for seeing ghosts in hidden corners,
for hearing whispers where there is only wind.

so i ask again,
why do you do this to yourself?
you have only yourself to blame.