Tuesday, February 14, 2012

misplaced trust and old friends.

i've watched a lot of movies in my life. some movies stick with me, and some don't.

some movies are so memorable to me for the weirdest reasons. i sometimes get stuck into watching and re-watching a movie just because of one scene, or one guy, or just...one feeling.

therefore, i present to you the saddest scene which i have ever encountered in a movie. few movies compare to the welling amount of sadness that i felt when...well, watch it for yourself. it's acted by tom hanks, who is my favourite actor ever, so i guess i am somewhat biased?

i don't normally exude such feelings towards volleyballs myself, but heck, when i first watched this scene back when i was younger, i think i cried. i honestly think i did. i cried because the attachment he felt towards wilson was as real as an attachment one would feel towards a best friend, or a lover, or a family member. he was crying for the loss of the only person he had. he was crying because when wilson was around he didn't feel so lonely.

i guess i can sort of relate to tom hanks' character in the movie. i get attached to the stupidest things sometimes, and people just don't understand why. it's not the thing, it's the feelings attached to the thing that matters.

for example, even though i am twenty four years old i still have a stuffed pillow in the shape of a cat as a bantal busuk. it seems kind of crazy and childish and irrational that i would keep something that i got when i was around fifteen years old for someone else's birthday (i decided to keep it because i thought it was adorable) but i look at tembam (lol yeah so i named it) and i don't ever see myself throwing it..him away.

he reminds me of sleepy nights watching movies with my friends, and sleeping by myself in a 'haunted' house (my old house in penang had this freaky, ominous feeling to it) and crying myself to sleep when i had fights with my parents or my friends or even my ex. he reminds me of happiness, of comfort and love, in times when i felt that no one could ever love me.

when we were children we all had these things, blankets or pillows or soft toys that we were attached to. what exactly happened to us to make us throw these things away? parents would often go with the 'she's too old for it' story, which makes me wonder: what exactly are we too old for anyways? we're too old for comfort? i dunno, i just don't quite understand it. someone please enlighten me.

i guess it's different for me. i don't really know how to seek comfort in people. people are confusing. people make me awkward. people often backstab you and break your heart and say things that make you feel like you want to jump off a bridge. people are unpredictable.

i guess i put more trust in a stuffed toy more than i believe in people? which, to be honest, is quite sad.

what is wrong with me?

Sunday, February 12, 2012

shameless gushing : mcfly edition.

i am embarrassed yet a bit happy with the news that i'm about to announce on this post.

ok, don't judge. i was bored. i have every right to like this band. the guys are adorable, nice and very talented.

ok but i still am embarrassed about this haha.

i am in love with mcfly.

oh god i said it. it's out. kill me now, and let me listen to them in peace.

i just randomly stumbled upon them. today. and for reasons unbeknownst to me, i really like the happy aura they're omitting. their songs are cute, and the lyrics are smart and cute, the beats are catchy, and oh my god look at them, they're so adorable:

pic credit to last.fm
i especially like harry, the dude in blue, and dougie, which is the blonde. they are hilarious. i can't stop watching them on youtube lol. well, them and judge judy.

(randomly, omg judge judy is freaking awesome. the show's funny, and the cases are funny, and the litigants on the case are sometimes so awkward and dumb and evil)

i've never actually been a fan before this, i mean the band's hardly new and i've known them from before, but i haven't actually paid attention to them i guess? but suddenly now i stumble upon them and the mood's right and i find myself thinking, "dammit, these songs are really catchy!"

here's a clip of dougie and tom singing transylvania, which is quite an awesome song, especially when sang acoustically. by dougie. *heart melts like a tween*

ok, it's not like it's embarrassing to like them, to be honest. i'd be more humiliated if i liked justin bieber or one of those crappeh rap artists that are always on tv nowadays singing about sex. so wtf, i like them. they're awesome. guilty pleasure music ftw.

i shall leave you with a final cute picture of dougie and harry. just cos i can.

pic credit to huffingtonpost.co.uk
dougie's hair looks so suave ahaha. (omg i'm such a fangirl)